Pie Face

It’s “stinger” season on the Great Barrier Reef, and an encounter with a bluebottle is a day-wrecker at best. Full-body lycra suits are mandatory. So, here’s a picture:

Cute, right? D-man isn’t smiling like a weirdo for once and he looks goddamn adorable. But enough about him, let’s look at me. Not bad! Clearly I remembered to suck in my gut – good job me – and the collar of that suit is doing some heavy lifting on the double chin, at least front and center. But then we went hoods up and look at this shit!

First of all, tell ’em Large Marge sent ya. And look at all that jowl meat getting squeezed up outta there like a water balloon! Jesus. Folks, that squooshy material in my neck-face area there is 100% pure Australian meat pie filling.